Ashley's Gift

I just wanted to share an experience I had last night. Ashley's mom invited me to attend the endowment session in which they were doing the work for Ashley. Lindsey came and watched the kids so I was able to go.

First of all, there is such a reverence in the temple, a feeling of peace and sacredness. I think that churches of all religions have some of that same reverence because they are places of worship, teaching of Christ, and houses of prayer. However, the reverence I feel in the temple is so much greater than that of just being in a church. As I sat in the chapel waiting for our session to start I felt this feeling of such gratitude, I was grateful to be there, I was grateful for the temple and the opportunity to share this experience with Ashley's family. I also felt Ashley was grateful, a feeling I've had on many occasions, almost like a whispering in my ear of her saying "Thank you for taking care of my girls." I'm not here to toot my own horn(or claim I'm conversing with the dead) because I don't feel I'm doing anything that is really noble or deserves extra attention, the girls needed someone to take care of them, Ashley asked me to care for them, so I am, and it's a gift to me to have the privilege be with them. I know there are sceptics out there, but I know what I know, I've felt what I have felt, and have no doubt in my mind that there is life after death, that spirits and angels are helping us along, and if we are receptive enough we will recognize the "messages" we are being given. I've felt promptings to "please be patient" when I was losing my patients, and promptings to tell Ava specific things about her Mama so she'll better understand that she didn't abandon them, and that she loves them so much. Literally sometimes it's at random times.

My experience was one of peace, and happiness. I was touched by Ashley's grandma introducing me to her family as "Ava and Mia's other Mama." I feel so grateful for their acceptance of me. They could really be the opposite and be resentful and hurt that the girls call me "Mom, Mommy, or Mama," which is something that I have never asked them to do, nor do I refer to myself in that way. Instead they have accepted me and shown me their love and acceptance. Really, it caused my heart to be so full, tears to poor out, and run slowly down my cheeks when being embraced by Ashley's mom and telling me Ashley wanted me to know that she loves me and is so grateful for me. What a great experience that was...as I left I felt Ashley was really happy, and filled with joy to have her work completed and to have us all there together on this momentous day. It was such an awesome experience.

I know there are people that don't understand why Ashley was taken from this earth at such an early age, and I can't say that I understand, but I know that there is a higher purpose and she has given this world the gift of two beautiful little girls.